Monday, March 12, 2012

Running Out

When I run I don't want to stop.  My weight, my separation, my stresses as a mother and teacher don't seem to factor.  My feet lift and land and I am transported into a different space and time.

I stated running when I was in grade 6.  I had never run competitively before that.  I remember that first run around the grounds of the my elementary school.  Most of the students couldn't make it all the way but I just flew.  I felt a surge of energy hit my body and felt delighted with my new found love.  When I got into junior high I had an inspirational gym teacher, Mrs. Hudson.  I will never forget her.  I used to see her running in the rain, snow and sun.  Whatever the weather she was out there running.  She encouraged me to keep active and she made me promise that I would never stop running.

Time passed, I got married, had children and I forgot Mrs. Hudson's words.  As a teen it was hard for me to understand why this women so close to retiring would spend the early morning hours of the day running up (a very hilly) Don Mills road.  Where did this desire come from and how did she maintain it? I don't know much of Mrs. Hudson's story but I can assume that she didn't run to look like a model, she didn't run because it was popular, and she didn't run to join a club.

On February 23rd, 2012 I lifted my feet and got ready to fly for the first time in years.  I remember being afraid to take those first few leaps because I thought I had forgotten how to run.  I found the image below and I use it as inspiration.  I remind myself that I am a runner.  That will never change.

Now as I lace up my battered running shoes I understand the compulsion, the desire and the need so much more.  I run because it brings my mind, body and spirit to a place where I can push the cant's, wont's, shouldn't, and couldn't beneath me.  When I run my tumultuous separation, my worries for my kids, my unending struggles run out before my desire to stop do.

What are you passion do you want to reclaim?

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